Disciplining Children: Six Ideas to help with your Stubborn Child

Love your child(ren)? Of course, you do. So when he or she misbehaves on a consistent basis, what’s the best way to administer discipline?

Well, as you may be aware, there is a wide range of thought on this subject. One school of thought teaches essentially hand’s off, and says, the little darlings are very intelligent, so let them figure it all out on their own. No punishment or reward systems.
The fact is that anyone who actually watches children behave – without preset mental filters – will almost certainly come to the conclusion that each child responds differently. Some children have a very high “pain” threshold. They can take whatever penalties you set as they stubbornly refuse to do what they should. There are others who can be easily motivated by various token systems.
So how do you find out what method of discipline will work for your child(ren)?
In a word: experiment!
Here are six ideas for proceeding.
#1 – Put on your “scientist hat.” Research what’s out there. No author knows your child better than you do. But many researchers have seen thousands of kids and had opportunities to try various strategies with children and their families. So knowing what’s been done before is a very good strategy to start.
#2 – Once you have a sense of what is possible, start interacting with your children. Bear in mind that we live in societies that are increasingly filled with busybodies who do everything they can to blur the lines between discipline and abuse. So be careful as you try different discipline ideas.
Important note: as you try these ideas, it is critically important that you (a) remember your main goal: raising good, intelligent children. And (b) be patient. This is as much an experiment for them as it is for you. They’ve never been where they are right now. It’s their first time being a kid at the age they are. And remember, you’re not dealing with lab rats here. You’re dealing with your children. Never lose sight of that.
#3 – When you find something that seems to work, don’t think you can finally relax. Usually, short-term hits to the bulls-eye with long-term success are few and far between. Your child may be responding to novelty as much as to the discipline. When the novelty wears off – and it will – your child may very well revert to the old behaviors that you tried to change. Novelty has a tough time lasting more than a few weeks. So give things at least 3-6 weeks to see if the changes are enduring.
child
#4 – Tweak before you make major changes in your efforts. For example, suppose you are rewarding your kid(s) with pizza at the end of the week if certain things are done right. And suppose you have reason to believe they are responding to novelty rather than the measures themselves. Rather than junking the measures, tweak them a bit to determine if your suspicion is valid. For example, you might vary the food rewards and say, “Look – if you do the right things, you get to pick what we have for Friday dinner.” You might be on the right track and tweaking gives you a chance to really find out.
#5 – If tweaking doesn’t work, then, by all means, try new approaches, keeping in mind all of the above.
#6 – Finally, be humble enough to know that you might need professional family help in the form of therapists and other counselor types. You’ve got to be careful here because these professionals vary widely in terms of competence and also in terms of appropriateness for your family. For example, some therapists suggest Ritalin as the first line of therapeutic intervention if the child is having trouble in school. You have a right to be skeptical in such situations. Listen to your own inner voice here.
Finally, use common sense. It sounds strange, but the fact is that no matter what professional help you may seek out, no matter what books you read, and no matter what online forums you participate in – YOU will be making the decisions. You are responsible, good or bad. Use the best judgment you can and proceed with caution.
Do you have a difficult child? How have you been dealing with discipline so far? Leave me a comment about your experience with disciplining your children.
I hope you are having a wonderful week!

Goodbye 2017: Looking back on the past year

I hope everyone had a very Happy New Year, and that you are spending quality time with friends and family.

Let’s hope 2018 will be a great year for us and our families.

I would like to take this time to look back through some 2017 posts in social media. Come with me through this past year…

TWITTER 2017

I cannot tell you how many times I’ve seen this particular post on all social media this week. It is so very true albeit annoying.

Sometimes, a tablet/iPad is the only way to get any quiet time/housework done, for your own sanity.

Instagram 2017

😂 #parentingin2017 #momgrouplife via @loud_momma

A post shared by Krista Lynn (@pinkrosemamablog) on

So this is what has become of our species 😂 @overheardla #parentingin2017 #lol

A post shared by Katie Vigos (@katievigos) on

Looking back at the fads of the year…

Fidget spinners!

The only one I approve of, the others I want to break.

A post shared by Raymonds Liquor Stop (@raymonds_liquor_stop) on

I don’t think I need to say anything about this next image. If you are on social media at all, you have seen this theme EVERYWHERE!

Unicorn hair, Unicorn Frapp, Unicorn cupcakes… the list goes on and on and on and on……

FACEBOOK

Stay at Home Moms: Momming Together

Mom Madness

That’s Inappropriate

YOUTUBE

 

 

 

 

Looking back on 2017, it was a pretty crazy, eventful year for all.

Not to say that it was bad, BUT hopefully, 2018 will be much better for everyone.

Have a wonderful week and take some time for yourself.

Let me know if you made a New Year’s resolution or what you hope to achieve before the end of 2018.

looking back

Christmas Fun: A distraction from the Holiday Chaos!

I usually do this type of favorites post at the beginning of the next month. But, this month, I decided to make it somewhat Christmas themed. I wanted to do this to give us a little chuckle in the midst of the Holiday stress.

It never fails to happen every year. You plan to start your shopping and planning for the holiday earlier than last year. You have the best of intentions on completing all of the tasks on your to-do list.

Then, you get sidetrack by this thing, that thing, then the other thing. Next thing you know, It’s the week of Christmas and you are even more behind than you were this time last year.

My advice? Christmas fun distraction.

Relax! You always come out on top every year with time to spare and a few extra things are done that you didn’t think you would have time for during the chaos.

You might say, “Oh, But the only reason I got everything done so well is that I pushed myself and stressed about everything.”

To that, I say, “Yea, maybe. But, did you enjoy yourself and the company of family and friends?”.

If the answer to that is “No.” Then try to relax, read some of these articles and other stuff and share it with your family and friends for some quality time together.

Join me for some Christmas fun distraction!

Christmas Fun! Pinterest Board

 

“Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year.” Victor Borge

“The principal advantage of the non-parental lifestyle is that on Christmas Eve you need not be struck dumb by the three most terrifying words that the government allows to be printed on any product: “Some assembly required.” John Leo

“The one thing women don’t want to find in their stockings on Christmas morning is their husband.” Joan Rivers

“Charlie, stay away from those things. They’re reindeer, you don’t know where they’ve been. They all look like they’ve got key lime disease.” Scott Calvin in The Santa Clause

Read more: http://www.keepinspiring.me/funny-christmas-quotes/#ixzz51uevK6Uu

 

DIY Unicorn Ornament

Amy’s Notebook 12-20-2017

 

I hope you have a Happy, Healthy and Safe Holiday Season!!!

What is the one thing that stresses you out the most every Christmas?

Let me know in the comments!

christmas fun distraction

 

Gingerbread and Mistletoe

 

 

How to Design a Child-Friendly Cleaning Schedule

Guest Post: James is a writer and cleaning expert from the UK. He’s currently editor of SpotlessVacuum.co.uk, which is a site dedicated to helping consumers buy the right vacuum cleaner. When he’s not writing, he enjoys long hiking trips with his family and two dogs.  

How to Design a Child-Friendly Cleaning Schedule

With the holiday season fast approaching, you’re probably searching for ways to make cleaning more efficient. It’s hard enough keeping a house tidy during the rest of the year – add over-excited children, presents, and mountains of food, and you have the perfect recipe for stress!

That’s why I’ve put together a step-by-step guide to designing a cleaning schedule that works for you and your children. Creating a schedule might seem like a lot of work, but it can help you clean the house faster so you can spend more time enjoying the holidays.

Step 1: Write Down All the Tasks You Need to Complete

Trying to remember each chore can make you feel like you’re constantly playing catch up. For this reason, the first step is to write down everything you need to clean and how often.

This list should be specific to your house and children. It should also contain everything – including infrequent chores. Even if you only need to clean the grout once a month, it still goes on the list.

Step 2: Decide Whether You Need Any New Tools

Most tasks don’t need fancy tools or appliances, but if you’re spending more time on a chore than you should be then it might be worth upgrading.

A good example is a vacuum cleaner. The best vacuum cleaners can make quick work of dust, dirt and pet hair. They can also tackle tough tasks like cleaning a car, by making it easy to remove dirt under seats or in glove compartments. Low-quality models, on the other hand, have weak suction power and often struggle to pick up dirt. This means you’ll spend more time cleaning for worse results.

Step 3: Choose Your Timings

There are many ways you can design a cleaning schedule. Here are some of the most common options:

  • The Weekly “Blow Out.” In this schedule, you do most of your cleaning chores during a single day of the week. It’s great if you work long hours or just don’t have time during the week – but it’s potentially the most stressful.
  • Daily Timed Sessions. One of my favorite cleaning schedules is to set a timer for a fixed length of time each day. You clean until the timer goes, then continue the next day where you left off.
  • The Ultra Schedule. If you want to be completely organized, you can use an app like Todoist to schedule every task in advance. You could, for example, schedule vacuuming once a week on Fridays, laundry every other day and mowing the lawn twice a month on Saturdays. You’ll never miss a chore with this method, but it’s also the least flexible.
  • Room-By-Room. Another option is to assign each room a day of the week. You then complete all the cleaning chores for that room on the specified day.

The right option depends on you and your children’s lives. Do your kids have lots of after-school activities and events? If so, a mixture of quick cleans in the evening and a longer session at the weekend might be a good choice. Do you spend all-day Saturday at your child’s sports games? Then a schedule that spreads out cleaning evenly throughout the week might be a better choice.

Step 4: Fit Tasks Into Your Schedule

Now you know which tasks need to be completed and when you’re planning to clean, the next step is to fit everything together. This is easier than it sounds, but how you create your schedule depends on the type you chose.

If you’re using daily timed sessions, for example, you can just write a long list of chores and work through them in order. The great thing about this method is that you don’t need to worry about finishing everything in one session, as you know you’ll continue tomorrow.

For the weekly blow-out option, write a list of everything that needs to be done on your cleaning day. You could also create a separate list of chores that need to be completed during the week (such as laundry or dishwashing).

Step 5: Remember to be Adaptable

The purpose of a cleaning schedule is to reduce stress and help you clean more effectively. While it’s important to stick to the routine, don’t worry if you miss a day. The schedule is for you – it should never be another source of stress.

This is especially important during the holiday season. There are going to be unexpected chores and clean-ups, which may mean you don’t have time for your scheduled tasks. This is fine – just adapt the schedule and move on.

Summary

I hope this article has helped you design a cleaning schedule that’s faster and less stressful. It might seem like a daunting process, but it doesn’t need to be perfect or set in stone. Give it a try – especially if you’re already starting to worry about the holiday season mess!

How did you like this article?  Do you think these tips will help you this holiday season?

Let me know what your Holiday cleaning schedule consists of this year?

Have a happy healthy Holiday!!!

Over-Parenting: Am I doing too much for my child?

Over-Parenting: Are You Doing Too Much for Your Child?

This is a somewhat uncomfortable subject, but there seems to be a concern these days over parents who “do too much.”

The problem of “learned helplessness” has reared its head lately, as children struggle to be independent after having everything done for them.

Are you over-parenting? Are you doing too much for your child? How can you tell?

First of all, be easy on yourself. Don’t allow yourself to feel guilty or condemned. Just take a look at your parenting and check out these tips, and make adjustments where you see fit.

1. “It’s Just Easier to Do It Myself”

Yes, in the short term, it is. Who has the time to listen to their seven-year-old gripe about tying his or her shoes – and act like he “can’t” by doing it wrong on purpose – when you need to get out the door or be late? In some cases, it’s better to be late…or anticipate this delay and allow time for it. Likely, it will only happen a few times before your child gets the hint that s/he better just tie their shoes.

Please note, though, that this will only work if your child knows how to do the task you’re expecting, whether it’s tying shoes or getting dressed or making the bed. If your child really doesn’t know how to do something, take the time to teach him/her first so that you both don’t end up frustrated. That brings us to the next point…

2. Give Your Kids Tools

Parents can err in two extremes – on the one hand, we do too much and don’t let them do anything on their own; but on the other hand, we can’t expect our kids to do things they don’t know how to do. The middle ground is giving kids the tools they need and then getting out of the way.

“Tools” come in the form of life skills, from preparing food to school projects to job interviews. If you step aside too soon, your child may not have the tools s/he needs to go forward with the task at hand and may give up. If you step in too often or too soon, your child may presume s/he can’t do it (or not care to bother since you’re doing it) and also give up. So a good idea is to teach your kids the skills involved and then step aside once you know that they know.

Sometimes, that means giving how-to details that can seem ridiculous to an adult but are necessary for a child.

3. Are You Fostering Internal Motivation?

Ultimately, motivation must come from within for true independence, say experts. Broad requests like “do your homework” or “clean your room” can seem overwhelming (think “clean your house” if you’re an adult! It’s a huge task when you phrase it that way).

Coaching and encouragement are fine, experts note; that’s not the same as doing the task for your child. Try making a checklist so s/he can see the steps involved in the chore or task at hand. Instead of “do your homework,” for example, you could make a list like this:

* Find comfy place to set up books
* Get a drink and a snack
* Write out spelling words and study list
* Do math worksheet
* Read chapter of book and write paragraph summary

You can break it down further, too, into sub-steps – whatever works for your child. Also, a list (preferably one your child helps write out) keeps you from having to tell him/her what to do over and over.

How do you teach your children things to do for themselves, that you normally did for them, around the house?

Let me know in the comments.

I hope you have a happy, healthy, and safe Thanksgiving.

I am so thankful that you took the time to read my post and I hope it helps you in some way.

 

 

How to keep it clean while traveling with toddlers

clean while traveling with toddlers
Guest Post by Sophia Evans who just loves to travel. She has plenty of experience when it comes to traveling with kids. To keep it clean is her passion and it is something that she strives for.
clean while traveling with toddlers

How to keep it clean while traveling with toddlers

Why traveling with toddlers is almost always linked with hassle? It does not have to be this way anymore. We are here to offer you some ideas which will make the traveling way much easier and…cleaner. No doubt, the most comfortable way of reaching from A to B, especially in the presence of small kids, is by car. Choosing this way of travel means that you do not have to conform with timetables and other strangers, that, let’s be honest, can turn every family holiday into a nightmare.

So in order the traveling to run on wheels, you need to make sure that everything is taken care of and it is well organized. Let’s make a start with lay the beginnings of keeping your car clean during the journey. Having small children most frequently means that your vehicle is littered with various toys, shoes, socks, wrappers and only God knows what else. Even though you clean and vacuum it on a regular basis, somehow it always ends up littered over and over again, before even you notice. We want to help you and make this cycle stop. Hopefully, you will find our ideas inspiring.

As you are set to leave for a longer time, you always need to be prepared. Keep bottled waters in the back of the car, they will always come in handy. Keep the backspace cleaned out so it can be the perfect place for changing a diaper, for example. When the child is done with this, you can put a travel potty there.

So we are done with the backspace which toddlers actually stay away from. So let’s roll up sleeves and move to the next territories. Make a rule for your kids to avoid drinks other than water. We are well experienced and we know how hard it is to get rid of milk or smoothie stains. Inevitably accidents happen just like spillages. You do not want to ruin your vacation, do you?

Most toddlers have the habit of bringing toys in the car, as many as possible. They do not want to get bored, right? At least they will stay focused during the travel and will not cause any troubles. If you do not want your car to get stuffed with numerous toys, remember that everything which comes in must come out. Your toddlers bring a toy in the car, then they need to learn to take it out as well. Before anything else, your car is not a playground.

Teach your toddlers to hand you forward all the trash including wrappers, handkerchiefs, plastic cups. They need to learn to give it to you so you can put it in one bag and then throw it away all at once when you stop to fill up the car with gas, let’s say. Having one space to clean out will surely make the traveling way much easier and cleaner.

The golden rule for a clean car is to vacuum it at least once per week. When you take your time to vacuum on a regular basis, you are more likely to keep it good looking. Seeing your car tidy and clean will surely get you breathe a sigh of relief.

You see that it is not that hard to keep your car clean when traveling with toddlers, don’t you? Your children will even notice the difference. You only need to teach them some rules and they will follow.

So, are you prepared for traveling?

My Favorite Inspiring Internet things in October

I absolutely love social media (minus the negativity), there are so many people who build each other up and just talk about their daily lives in hopes to convey a sense of normalcy for people who feel as if they are alone in their struggles.

I can tell you from experience that no matter what you are going through as a mother or how alone you feel in a situation, you are not alone. We as mothers need to stick together and build each other up not tear each other down when we don’t agree with the decisions we make for our own families.

Here are the uplifting social media posts I have enjoyed in the month of October.

TWITTER

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

INSTAGRAM

 

 

Remember: YOU are everything they need and more!!! ❤

A post shared by Whitney@weesleep.ca (@weesleep_whitney) on

 

 

 

 

Strength grows in the moments you think you can’t go on but you keep going anyway. . Over the past couple of years we have walked through the fires of hell. . Injustice. Deceit. Betrayal. Character Assassination. . There were moments where I just wanted to give up. Run away. There is nothing worse than when someone accuses you of something that isn’t true. It was in these moments, I found out who I was and how strong I was created to be. . I knew that I had two choices. 1) To Get Bitter or 2) To Get Better. It’s that simple. You either take what has been dealt to you and allow it to make you better or you allow it to tear you down. The choice belonged to me, not my circumstances. . You can feel like the flames of the fires are engulfing you and that there is no escape. I PROMISE you, truth always wins and justice always prevails. It may take longer than you would like, but those flames are refining you, they are not destroying you. They are a part of your story in becoming all you were created to be. . This week was a beautiful and life breathing week for our family. A close of one chapter and an exciting beginning of the next. It hasn’t been easy, but we made it and we are stronger for it. Believe when I say, when I look into a fire, I smile. The flames inside of me burn stronger than any fire around me. . Friends, there is going to be very painful moments in your life that will change your entire world in the matter of minutes. Let them make you stronger, kinder and smarter. But don’t you dare go and become someone you are not. . You are stronger than you know.

A post shared by Simply, Jen (@jen.gamble) on

 

 

 

 

.. especially after a night of tricks and treats & sugar highs 😳 . Tag a Mom who gets it!

A post shared by Unicorn Moms Of LI (@unicornmomsofli) on

 

 

Especially with #twoundertwo!

A post shared by Jen Piazza (@awesomelyimperfect) on

 

 

FACEBOOK

Truth Bomb Mom: Perfect Mom

**NEW VIDEO!** This might be one of the most important videos I've made.The three women featured are all real moms and these are their real stories.

Posted by Kristina Kuzmic on Thursday, August 17, 2017

 

https://www.facebook.com/mythoughtsaboutstuff/

 

PINTEREST

A Little Pinch of Perfect

Mom Encouragement

Organized Motherhood

just Andrea

 

BLOGS

Healing Mama Remedies

Mom Advice

Cool Mom Picks

Mom Spark

Our Kids Mom

Thrifty Nifty Mommy

Mommifried

That’s Inappropriate (this is my favorite site right now!)  I am linking all of her socials because I think every mom needs her in their lives.

 

All of these that I’ve listed so far are very inspiring and help me to realize even on my worst days, that I am not alone.

I hope that this post has helped you in some way to motivate and inspire you to keep going no matter how hard it may seem at the time.

Here are a few quotes and pretty images for an extra boost 🙂

            

  It has been proven that even just the action of smiling (when you don’t feel happy) can greatly improve your mood.

Take some time to live in the moment without rushing around trying to get everything done.

October went by in a hurry because we had so much to do. It can get so hectic and we forget to savor the moments we can never get back.

So, this November, be thankful that you are able to rush the kids all over the place but also take the time and be thankful that you can spend it with those you love.

Have a happy and healthy week!