Over-Parenting: Am I doing too much for my child?

Over-Parenting: Are You Doing Too Much for Your Child?

This is a somewhat uncomfortable subject, but there seems to be a concern these days over parents who “do too much.”

The problem of “learned helplessness” has reared its head lately, as children struggle to be independent after having everything done for them.

Are you over-parenting? Are you doing too much for your child? How can you tell?

First of all, be easy on yourself. Don’t allow yourself to feel guilty or condemned. Just take a look at your parenting and check out these tips, and make adjustments where you see fit.

1. “It’s Just Easier to Do It Myself”

Yes, in the short term, it is. Who has the time to listen to their seven-year-old gripe about tying his or her shoes – and act like he “can’t” by doing it wrong on purpose – when you need to get out the door or be late? In some cases, it’s better to be late…or anticipate this delay and allow time for it. Likely, it will only happen a few times before your child gets the hint that s/he better just tie their shoes.

Please note, though, that this will only work if your child knows how to do the task you’re expecting, whether it’s tying shoes or getting dressed or making the bed. If your child really doesn’t know how to do something, take the time to teach him/her first so that you both don’t end up frustrated. That brings us to the next point…

2. Give Your Kids Tools

Parents can err in two extremes – on the one hand, we do too much and don’t let them do anything on their own; but on the other hand, we can’t expect our kids to do things they don’t know how to do. The middle ground is giving kids the tools they need and then getting out of the way.

“Tools” come in the form of life skills, from preparing food to school projects to job interviews. If you step aside too soon, your child may not have the tools s/he needs to go forward with the task at hand and may give up. If you step in too often or too soon, your child may presume s/he can’t do it (or not care to bother since you’re doing it) and also give up. So a good idea is to teach your kids the skills involved and then step aside once you know that they know.

Sometimes, that means giving how-to details that can seem ridiculous to an adult but are necessary for a child.

3. Are You Fostering Internal Motivation?

Ultimately, motivation must come from within for true independence, say experts. Broad requests like “do your homework” or “clean your room” can seem overwhelming (think “clean your house” if you’re an adult! It’s a huge task when you phrase it that way).

Coaching and encouragement are fine, experts note; that’s not the same as doing the task for your child. Try making a checklist so s/he can see the steps involved in the chore or task at hand. Instead of “do your homework,” for example, you could make a list like this:

* Find comfy place to set up books
* Get a drink and a snack
* Write out spelling words and study list
* Do math worksheet
* Read chapter of book and write paragraph summary

You can break it down further, too, into sub-steps – whatever works for your child. Also, a list (preferably one your child helps write out) keeps you from having to tell him/her what to do over and over.

How do you teach your children things to do for themselves, that you normally did for them, around the house?

Let me know in the comments.

I hope you have a happy, healthy, and safe Thanksgiving.

I am so thankful that you took the time to read my post and I hope it helps you in some way.

 

 

Hello, my name is Kristen Osborne I am a happy mother of one beautiful little girl. Very into the internet and trying out new things.

7 Picks for the Absolute “Best Mom Sneakers” for Active Moms

For as far back as I can remember I’ve always tried to find comfortable sneakers that also looked good with regular clothes. I was not successful.

But, now it seems there are so many different styles and colors that you can almost always find a cute pair that fits into your active lifestyle.

I have so many favorites these days, but I’ve chosen my Top 7 Best “Mom Sneakers” that fit great, are super comfortable, and look so good for any occasion. you might need to be active yet look great!

(There are affiliate links here. If you choose to click on them and make a purchase I could make a commission o support this blog at no extra cost to you)

My Top 7 Picks of the Best Mom Sneakers for Active Moms

1- Onitsuka Tiger by Asics Womens Mexico 66 Slip-On

Woven fabric uppers with synthetic overlays and a suede t-toe cap. Laceless construction with metallic eyelets detail. Canvas lining and a perforated, cushioned footbed for all-day comfort.  Flip top heel flap for a personalized look

2- Skechers Sports Women’s Gratis Bungee Fashion Sneaker

Sporty comfort combines with smooth slinky style in the SKECHERS Gratis – Sleek and Chic shoe. Soft woven one-piece mesh fabric upper in a slip on bungee laced sporty casual comfort sneaker with stitching and overlay accents.

3- Reebok Women’s Ec Ride Jaq Classic Shoe

Take a run on the wild side. Dash through downtown in this lightweight kick, low-cut for the mobility to swerve and sprint. A jacquard upper keeps feet fastened through any ride.

 

4- TOMS Women’s Del Rey Sneaker

The TOMS Del Rey sneaker is a lightweight sneaker with all the features and benefits you’ve come to know and love from the brand. The lightweight EVA bottom keeps you feeling light on your feet, making the Del Rey sneaker perfect for wearing out and about.

 

5- adidas Originals Women’s Tubular Shadow

Redefining sportswear for the street, the Tubular Shadow takes design inspiration from an iconic ’93 runner. These women’s shoes have a distressed canvas upper for a modern, natural look. A contemporary wrap closure provides a comfortable fit.

 

6- PUMA Women’s Vikky Sneaker

Sporty and on-the-go essential with a supple finish Round Toe.

 

7- Reebok Women’s Print Run Prime Ultk Track Shoe

Discover your speed with the Reebok print run prime. The knit upper delivers maximum comfort and style. The dual-density construction uses 3D foam compounds for support.

 

 

I love all of these sneakers so much. They each have great qualities that any active mom could utilize. They are not only so comfortable and fit great but they are so cute too. They are the best mom sneakers right now!

I hope you found at least one pair of sneakers that you love and will help you be a more comfortable active mommy 🙂

 

What do you think is the most important thing in an active lifestyle as a mom? Let me know in the comments!

 

best mom sneakers

 

 

 

Hello, my name is Kristen Osborne I am a happy mother of one beautiful little girl. Very into the internet and trying out new things.

My Favorite Inspiring Internet things in October

I absolutely love social media (minus the negativity), there are so many people who build each other up and just talk about their daily lives in hopes to convey a sense of normalcy for people who feel as if they are alone in their struggles.

I can tell you from experience that no matter what you are going through as a mother or how alone you feel in a situation, you are not alone. We as mothers need to stick together and build each other up not tear each other down when we don’t agree with the decisions we make for our own families.

Here are the uplifting social media posts I have enjoyed in the month of October.

TWITTER

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

INSTAGRAM

 

 

Remember: YOU are everything they need and more!!! ❤

A post shared by Whitney@weesleep.ca (@weesleep_whitney) on

 

 

 

 

Strength grows in the moments you think you can’t go on but you keep going anyway. . Over the past couple of years we have walked through the fires of hell. . Injustice. Deceit. Betrayal. Character Assassination. . There were moments where I just wanted to give up. Run away. There is nothing worse than when someone accuses you of something that isn’t true. It was in these moments, I found out who I was and how strong I was created to be. . I knew that I had two choices. 1) To Get Bitter or 2) To Get Better. It’s that simple. You either take what has been dealt to you and allow it to make you better or you allow it to tear you down. The choice belonged to me, not my circumstances. . You can feel like the flames of the fires are engulfing you and that there is no escape. I PROMISE you, truth always wins and justice always prevails. It may take longer than you would like, but those flames are refining you, they are not destroying you. They are a part of your story in becoming all you were created to be. . This week was a beautiful and life breathing week for our family. A close of one chapter and an exciting beginning of the next. It hasn’t been easy, but we made it and we are stronger for it. Believe when I say, when I look into a fire, I smile. The flames inside of me burn stronger than any fire around me. . Friends, there is going to be very painful moments in your life that will change your entire world in the matter of minutes. Let them make you stronger, kinder and smarter. But don’t you dare go and become someone you are not. . You are stronger than you know.

A post shared by Simply, Jen (@jen.gamble) on

 

 

 

 

.. especially after a night of tricks and treats & sugar highs 😳 . Tag a Mom who gets it!

A post shared by Unicorn Moms Of LI (@unicornmomsofli) on

 

 

Especially with #twoundertwo!

A post shared by Jen Piazza (@awesomelyimperfect) on

 

 

FACEBOOK

Truth Bomb Mom: Perfect Mom

**NEW VIDEO!** This might be one of the most important videos I've made.The three women featured are all real moms and these are their real stories.

Posted by Kristina Kuzmic on Thursday, August 17, 2017

 

https://www.facebook.com/mythoughtsaboutstuff/

 

PINTEREST

A Little Pinch of Perfect

Mom Encouragement

Organized Motherhood

just Andrea

 

BLOGS

Healing Mama Remedies

Mom Advice

Cool Mom Picks

Mom Spark

Our Kids Mom

Thrifty Nifty Mommy

Mommifried

That’s Inappropriate (this is my favorite site right now!)  I am linking all of her socials because I think every mom needs her in their lives.

 

All of these that I’ve listed so far are very inspiring and help me to realize even on my worst days, that I am not alone.

I hope that this post has helped you in some way to motivate and inspire you to keep going no matter how hard it may seem at the time.

Here are a few quotes and pretty images for an extra boost 🙂

            

  It has been proven that even just the action of smiling (when you don’t feel happy) can greatly improve your mood.

Take some time to live in the moment without rushing around trying to get everything done.

October went by in a hurry because we had so much to do. It can get so hectic and we forget to savor the moments we can never get back.

So, this November, be thankful that you are able to rush the kids all over the place but also take the time and be thankful that you can spend it with those you love.

Have a happy and healthy week!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hello, my name is Kristen Osborne I am a happy mother of one beautiful little girl. Very into the internet and trying out new things.

63 Family Activities to beat the heat this Summer

We all know, the summer heat is not going away anytime soon. So, your kids may be spending a lot of their time inside the house.

Here are some DIY craft/activities to keep the kids busy.

12 DIY Crafts

-Wooden Peg Dolls are all the rage but it can get expensive to buy individual dolls, especially if you have more than one child. They are very easy to make and the materials are inexpensive. Check out this tutorial to make your own wooden peg dolls.

-Felt boards! A twist on paper dolls… Felt Monsters you don’t have to make them into monsters you can make princesses or knights and dragons. Your children’s imagination has no limits 🙂

-Homemade musical instruments… kids love making noise, what better way to teach them that with musical instruments? Tin Can Drums

-Choose your child’s favorite colors and make these cards. Craft Foam Sewing Cards

-These ABC Game Pieces are a fun learning tool for tracing or letter learning.

-Are you a mom of an infant? This is a great learning tool. Infant Sensory Boards Bright colors, a variety of textures, and fabric colors.

-Two words…. Homemade Playdough

-A Marble Run is a great way to prevent boredom. Hours of fun and laughter with this great activity.

-Make learning fun with this Sight Words Treasure Hunt. Somewhat like a scavenger hunt, but they are looking for letters to spell out the words.

-Always a winner with young children is Homemade Finger Paints.

-The Hot Air Balloon Craft is a really fun activity for kids and parents to enjoy.

-Tic-Tac-Toe is a fun game for everyone. Make this DIY game set out of durable fabric so you and your children can enjoy it time and again.

51 Activities for Hot Days

  1. Run through the sprinklers
  2. Visit a water park
  3. Take a picnic to the beach, Pack lots of cold, refreshing drinks.
  4. Visit an ice cream parlor
  5. Fill water toys with ice cold water and chase the family outside
  6. Go to the bookstore and browse all the great new releases
  7. Go to the movies
  8. Read a book together
  9. Make your own ice pops
  10. Rent a DVD or stream a Netflix movie for the whole family
  11. Let the kids have fun washing the car (with your supervision)
  12. Go to a Baseball game
  13. Help the kids set up a lemonade stand
  14. Go to a bowling alley
  15. Visit a local aquarium
  16. BOARD GAMES
  17. Box fans are great for robot voices
  18. Go to the library and show your kids your favorite old books
  19. Get the kids together and do a random act of kindness
  20. Get out the coloring books and color in silly ways
  21. Play a game of hide and seek
  22. Build a fort with pillows and blankets
  23. Do some baking
  24.  Get the kids interested in dusting by making it a game
  25. Dance (make up silly moves and have a contest)
  26. Learn a new song
  27. Have an indoor picnic
  28. Legos
  29. Have a tea party
  30. Make roads on the floor with painters tape and race toy cars
  31. Play kitchen and pretend to cook for each other
  32. Dress up       
  33. Put together a large puzzle (put it in a place where it can stay out for a while and work on it a bit every day)
  34. Create your own song with your kid’s toy instruments and encourage them to use their imaginations
  35. Sticker Collage (have the kids put stickers on paper n any way they want
  36. Take a nap (Hot air can make you very tired.  Drink a glass of water and then take a nap with the kids)
  37. Have a painting party with watercolors
  38. Play a card game
  39. Guess what? (put an object in a paper bag, and have your children close their eyes and they feel it and try to guess what it is)
  40. Grocery Store (let kids “shop” around the house and chek out with fake money)
  41. Go see some local indoor attractions
  42. Set up a small tent in the house and pretend to go camping
  43. Put on a puppet show
  44. Play with a train set
  45. Make a craft basket (anything that can be used to craft goes in the basket. whenever they are bored they can get the basket and make something
  46. Take silly pictures       
  47. Make shadow puppets on the wall
  48. Balloon toss (make sure the balloon doesn’t touch the ground
  49. Gather some medium sized rocks. Wash them and paint them into “pet rocks”
  50. Scavenger Hunt
  51. Push each of the kids around in the laundry basket (extra points for getting them to help with folding and putting away before the fun ride in the basket).

 

 

Extremely hot days can be boring for the kids. Hopefully, this list gave you some ideas for fun family activities to fight the boredom and the heat.

 

Is there anything not on this list that you like to do on those hot summer days?

Let me know in the comments and please share if you enjoyed this post.

 

family activities for the hot days of summer

 

 

 

 

Hello, my name is Kristen Osborne I am a happy mother of one beautiful little girl. Very into the internet and trying out new things.

What I want for Mother’s Day Gifts? No not that!!!

 

In all my almost 34 years I have never heard of anyone asking a mother what SHE wants for Mother’s Day.

Yet, I see so many articles and blog posts boasting about what mom REALLY wants this time of year.

I have read numerous of these posts and I have come to a startling conclusion… they are all full of lies (in my honest opinion).

I only say this because most of the posts that I have read are all about fashionable clothing and jewelry and extravagant spa days.

But, I know that most of the mother’s that I have encountered in my life want none of that! I know what Mother’s Day Gifts I would want.

So, I have decided to write my own post about those things I know other mom’s like me would appreciate this Mother’s Day.

I also took into account the silliest of the internet “Mother’s Day” gifts. Which, I will admit, made me chuckle a little too much.

I had to reel myself in because the internet is a dangerous place sometimes. I found myself in a dark hole of padded underwear and knee high rainbow socks.

Here are a few things on my list that are figurative so to speak

  1. Sarcasm font: for those times you have to text someone who is on your last nerve but you can’t be as blunt as you would like at that moment.
  2. A literal THANK YOU for everything I do all day every other day of the year.
  3. For people who do not have children to keep their 2 cents to themselves and let me parent my child.
  4. For mothers to just STOP judging each other! Everyone is different and your parenting style is just that… yours.

I am moving on because this list could get feisty.

Some romantic Mother’s Day gifts.

Now, let us delve into a few romantic gifts/things to do. I am not one for sappy romance but some of these are nice.

  • A weekend getaway: Now I’ve had a few of these and depending on where you go, it can be a lot of fun.
  • Links of Love Necklace honestly I know I said I didn’t want jewelry, but if I had to pick something this would definitely be the one. This is such a simple yet beautiful piece and the contrast is so pretty to me.

  • Tea Bag Pocket Mug I mean what is better than a practical gift? I drink at least one cup of tea a day. It is so annoying when I sit down to enjoy my cup and I have to get up to throw away the tea bag because I don’t want to set in on the table as that will leave a wet mark. I’m all about making less work for myself.

  • Farm Fresh Spa Experience Kit this one is also a little contradictory, But, hear me out. Giving mom a spa gift card puts a time limit on her gift and she feels pressured (I know I would). This puts the decisions in her hands as to when she wants to do this and it’s more relaxing in your own home.

Okay, that’s enough of that.

Let us get to the fun part (at least it was fun for me to find all these silly things).

Alrightie, I’m going to start off with one that is sure to please any mom who has to deal with their significant other or teenagers.

  • Bandelettes Now when I first saw these I thought it was a joke…. they are real. And after further inspection, they make sense, but certainly not as a mother’s day gift!

  • Novel-teas going back to the cute tea bag pocket mug… these are NOVEL-TEAS 🙂 In their words ”bookish tea bags tagged with wry quotes from literary greats”.

This next one is a “What the what?” moment for me. So I thought maybe you would get a kick out of my confusion.

  • The Pee Pocket yes… you read that correctly The PEE POCKET! I have oh so many questions… 1- Why did I find this in a search for Mother’s Day Gifts? 2- In what situation would this be an acceptable way to relieve yourself? And 3- What the WHAT?!?!!

mother's day gifts

 

  • Instant Audience I could never say it as well as they do… “Let’s face it, you’re a star who deserves your own audience! Even if friends and family don’t agree. You can have your own audience in your pocket with the Instant Audience sound effects box. You will be loved and adored, and always the funniest one in the room. If someone tries to upstage you, just hit the “crickets” or “boo” sound button to let them know they’re not as funny as you.” YES!!!

 

 

Now this one is just over the top…. 

  • Complaint Sticky Notes Now I like this one. Use this sticky note pad to write a complaint and hang in on the fridge and I will then cover it with artwork drawn by the children 🙂

  • Custom Bobblehead I don’t think that there is another thing in this entire world that is more narcissistic than having a bobblehead made of yourself :/

And now I have to stop before I dig myself even deeper into the pits of interweb hell.

I hope you got a nice chuckle and maybe some actual good ideas for Mother’s Day.

Hopefully, you don’t receive a remote control bottle opener or a PEE POCKET for your Mother’s Day gifts!!!

mother's day gifts

Have a wonderful week and Happy Mother’s Day!!!

Hello, my name is Kristen Osborne I am a happy mother of one beautiful little girl. Very into the internet and trying out new things.

Official List of the awesome stuff I loved in April

(Affiliate links in this post. If you click through and make a purchase I could make a commission at no extra cost to you. I would never endorse a product that I would not use myself.)

I have really come to enjoy collecting my favorite Social Media posts and other internet related things as a blogger.

All through the month, I save the things that speak to me. Whether that be emotionally or mentally or even spiritually.

It is so much fun and even relaxing to like and then share great posts from talented people, even if they are not bloggers.

This month is no different, I have compiled a list of really great posts that I really loved.

I like to start with a few quotes to bring the mood up and motivate those mommies who are having a bad day.

I hope this post gives you some inspiration and maybe even a laugh or two.

So, let’s get into my official awesome April list…

QUOTES

“Good, better, best. Never let it rest, until your good is better and your better is best”

“If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change” (always my go to for the bad days)

My own….. “Everything I need to know I learned in kinder…. No… everything I need to know I learned from my mother… and that is the truth”

“The time spent on the family is not a sacrifice. You are living a life with choices; when you make the right ones, you have a good life.”

“Your most valuable parenting skill is learning to manage yourself first”

“And remember that behind every successful woman is a basket of dirty laundry”

“Parenting is the easiest thing in the world to have an opinion about, but the hardest thing in the world to do”

 

TWITTER

https://twitter.com/awsmnss29/status/857991889114542080 *****

 

INSTAGRAM

 

 

FACEBOOK

https://www.facebook.com/Elissathemom/

https://www.facebook.com/thedrunkmom/

https://www.facebook.com/singlemumstyle/

https://www.facebook.com/littlemissblg/

https://www.facebook.com/OrganizingMotherhood/

https://www.facebook.com/momalwaysknows/

https://www.facebook.com/OneAwesomeMomma/

https://www.facebook.com/alliesmommy7/ *****

 

BLOGS

http://www.momadvice.com/post/amys-notebook-04-26-17

http://familycorner.blogspot.com/2017/04/happy-homemaker-monday-04172017.html

Hobbies From Home: Fun, Productive Ideas for Busy Moms

Dads, Be Tender With Your Children

Sometimes We Have to Step Back For Parenting to Come Into Focus

Stay-at-Home Mom Resources and Advice You’ll Love

http://alliesmommy.com/ *****

PINTEREST

https://www.pinterest.com/thebettermom/

https://www.pinterest.com/stayasahm/

https://www.pinterest.com/the1dergirl/

https://www.pinterest.com/agnesrhodes/

https://www.pinterest.com/reneearbia/

https://www.pinterest.com/prosahm/

https://www.pinterest.com/ReluctantlyHome/

https://www.pinterest.com/alliesmommyblog/ *****

 

*****shameless plugs… because this is the first time in my blogging journey {over a year} where I’m actually proud of my content.

Thank you for reading 🙂

So this has been the…

I hope you have enjoyed this post as much as I enjoyed putting it together!

What have you enjoyed this month? Anything new and special you’ve done that you would like to share? Let me know in the comments.

If you enjoyed this post please share to your friends and family.

Have a wonderful week!!!

Hello, my name is Kristen Osborne I am a happy mother of one beautiful little girl. Very into the internet and trying out new things.

Happy Parenting: Quotes and videos and ideas… Oh My!

HAPPY PARENTING: QUOTES AND VIDEOS AND IDEAS… O MY!

Does Happy Parenting actually exist? Can we still be the women we were before we had children? Are we doomed to be miserable forever?

Literally, every day brings a new set of challenges to face. Not only as moms but as women in general.

You are not just a stay-at-home-mom/working mother. You are so much more…

You are a:

daughter

sister

aunt

friend

wife/girlfriend/lover

employee/boss

All of these jobs bring different joys and stresses. They come together to make us the people we are today and every day. They are a big part of who we are as a person.

There is so much negative going on in our world that I wanted to focus on some positivity. We all need a little pick me up now and again.

HAPPY PARENTING

Videos

Affirmations

 

Who am I? (religious)

 

Quotes

 

happy parenting

Inspiring Blogs to Read

Working Mom Balance

Get Mom Balanced

Lemon Lime Adventures

Poem

You are the sunlight in my day,
You are the moon I see far away.
You are the tree I lean upon,
You are the one that makes troubles be gone.
You are the one who taught me life,
How not to fight, and what is right.
You are the words inside my song,
You are my love, my life, my mom.
You are the one who cares for me,
You are the eyes that help me see.
You are the one who knows me best,
When it’s time to have fun and time to rest.
You are the one who has helped me to dream,
You hear my heart and you hear my screams.
Afraid of life, but looking for love,
I’m blessed for God sent you from above.
You are my friend, my heart, and my soul
You are the greatest friend I know.
You are the words inside my song,
You are my love, my life, my Mom.

In a perfect world, everyone (the kids) would get along and we wouldn’t be overworked. But, until that happens, let’s try to help each other get through this mom thing together.

 

What is the one thing that stresses you out the most as a mom?

What do you do to de-stress at home?

Hope everyone has a stress free week!!!

Thanks for stopping by 🙂

Kristen

Allie’s Mommy

 

P.S. Happy Parenting!

Hello, my name is Kristen Osborne I am a happy mother of one beautiful little girl. Very into the internet and trying out new things.